A Rainbow

It has been well over a long time since I have written anything in here. My home does not have the internet so it is only when I have time to write at my parents or grandparents house that I can post. So forgive me if you have stopped coming to our blog because there is nothing to read. I keep saying that I will try to do better but life has kept me busy and on my toes so I am not sure how much better it gets.

Tonight was Chinese food night at my parents house. My husband is off at a bachelor party for a friend of ours and I am left feeling very alone...does that seem weird that marriage has done that to me? In some cases, I feel very independent but when it comes down to it, I just don't feel right without Davey. My emotions make it only worse. I literally cried when he left and I feel bad that he had to deal with that and then leave...he is a good husband...But it just seems that the stress and business of life builds me up to break me down every once in a while. Which brings me to my next subject...

Vacation...Next Wednesday, we are going with our family to Hawaii and it just seems that this break came at a good time. I need the relaxation and fun. But seriously, especially what I need is the chance to sleep and then choose when to wake up and start my day, the chance to do something spontaneous/spur of the moment. Its my chance to have a week of adventure and fun. And though this picture is not of Hawaii, it just reminds me of my great family and the wonderful vacations we go on together. And here comes another one!!! YAY!



The next subject I feel I need to get out of system but which seems to be a very hard one to talk about at the moment is Anasazi...Anasazi Kim, my 6 weeks, dawnstar week, missing the dinner, and not being involved. There seems to be A LOT of subjects right there, all relating back to one special word...Anasazi. So Ill start with Kim and how much it bothers me that the one chance I have to see her is during the time I am in Hawaii. Can I tell you that when I learned about that, tears were also noticeable? I cant really explain why I get that way, especially when it is towards someone I haven't seen in a long time anyway, but it seems to happen. And I also cant explain my relationship with Kim or how even though I seem to be getting older, she always has even BETTER advice...Ive never met anyone else that can just do that. So it bothers me(not that she gives good advice but that Im not seeing her.haha)...and maybe thats why I feel out of the Anasazi world...because visits to the office were usually centered around Kim and advice. I havent step foot in that office in over 8 months. And I just don't feel apart of it. But these pictures only show that I will always be a part of it, that Anasazi can mean something to me, even if I don't think about it every day and dream about being there. It just means life has moved on, right? 'sigh'. Sometimes, life moving on can be tough.

So it seems that this message only says I am on to new life adventures, trying to figure out what is going to come next. I don't mean for this message to sound like life is bad because it certainly isnt. Sometimes it is draining, but seriously, I couldnt have hoped for better things in my life to happen. I know I shouldn't focus on the bad things going on or that I miss the way my life was because I wouldn't change it for a billion dollars but finding out about two great things in my life conflicting was just a bummer...thats just what it was! We'll see where it takes me...life's next adventures.
I can only promise to TRY and update you often.
Take care and Happy Thanksgiving!

~Suzanne Maughan~